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/movies/538442/carnage-park
Review of Carnage Park
by Joseph Sheldahl
Posted on April 20th, 2022
Negative 2
Overall Rating
 
+
probably one of the worst movies i've seen in a long while. it bounces back and forth between rip-off, homage, and pastiche so furiously that it's impossible to give a shit about anything that's going on. this is a 77 minute wankfest to the tune of tarantino, peckinpah, and rob zombie. and honestly? the only thing that carries it is the the strength of the actors. everything else is god awful. the editing is mind numbingly bad, the story is convoluted, the plot goes virtually nowhere, and the ending is horribly anti-climactic. really, the movie makes no good use of it's villain- who apparently spends all his time making weird traps and setting up voice recordings everywhere. the initial concept touts him as a psychotic sniper, but as the movie goes on, it just keeps heaping tropes on there in a 'kitchen sink' mentality. not only is he a sniper, he's a redneck hillbilly, who has a brother in the sheriff's dept. and who's a criminal mastermind/serial killer who's been doing this for years. what the fuck? could you get any more cliche? also, i realize that the people who seem to be enjoying this movie, are the ones looking for a horror fix. they're also the same people who call green room a disappointment because it was a thriller and not a horror movie. carnage park is split right down it's unsightly middle as a haphazard and sophomoric blend of (not-)true crime thriller and bullshit rob zombie horror aesthetic. yet, unsurprisingly, it does neither well. the climax drags on and on, slowing to a crawl and a pitch black screen, the movie winds down as the protagonist stumbles around in an abandoned mining tunnel with no light. which is exactly how i felt as a viewer. except instead of being consumed with hopelessness and terror, it was annoyance and disbelief. as the heroine finally escapes from the killer's terribly improbable gauntlet of horrors, and every horror cliche in the book has been dutifully checked off (from creepy laughing doll, to killer who wears a gas mask for no reason, to an endless slew of jump scares... ugh) she stands there in frantic relief, crying, laughing, and gasping for breath. i couldn't even see the character at this point. it was instead, the actress herself who had just survived this grueling shitfest of a movie. i'd argue that the director was the real villain here.


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