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i actually liked this stupid ass movie. it's just personalities gone wild in an aftermarket riff on the running man and battle royale. only this time... with *gasp* a commentary about the internet and reality tv! it's so pointed and straightforward that you can't help but smile at how fucking earnest it is. also, people say "world wide web" in this movie, which dates it pretty hard.
on the other hand, it should be way bloodier and more violent than it ultimately ends up being. it's super aggressive, sure, but not all that graphic or creative. that's the key word here. creative violence is always more entertaining. i didn't really mind the mind numbing amount of shaky cam in the fights, but this is a movie kind of obsessed with how hard it is. it postures to its viewer about how tough and violent and no-nonsense it is... but it's all fluff.
most people in this movie die via explosion, and it's such a cop out. there's one guy who gets impaled on a spike... and it's an accident, not even taking place during an action scene. the filmmakers need to be sat down, and treated to a marathon of van damme and chuck norris flicks. the kind of hard-hitting and bone-snapping ridiculousness that action fans love. did movies like the condemned ever truly catch on?
either way, it's actually pleasantly bland, like a palate cleanser. stone cold is the fuckin' dude in this movie. i'm gonna talk like him for a week now, in his whisper-gruff voice. i did like it when he taped some metal rods to his forearms before heading into a knife fight. it was smart and really cool. he's also such a gosh darn nice guy here. he doesn't wanna hurt anyone, and spends the first half of the movie in outright defiance.
when vinnie jones eventually goes final form sadist in front of mister stone cold, he finally has had... enough! "game on." he says, because of course he does. this is that kind of movie, and that's okay. it's wholly unremarkable, but safe and familiar fun nonetheless.
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