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Two and a Half Men

Two and a Half Men

2003 - 2015  •  CBS  •  109 hours  •  262 episodes
391 votes
249540 votes
# 5730
Charlie is a well-to-do bachelor with a house at the beach, a Jaguar in the front, and an easy way with women. His casual Malibu lifestyle is interrupted when his tightly wound brother Alan, who's facing a divorce, and his son Jake, come to live with him. Together, these two and a half men confront the ... More
  Previously Aired Episode
Of Course He's Dead (2) Aired on 02/19/2015
Of Course He's Dead (2)
Season 12: Episode 16
  New Episode Air Date
Series ended
262 episodes total
Two and a Half Men | Best of Charlie Harper (Compilation) | Two and a Half Men | TV Land
Season 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12
Season 1
S01 E01
Pilot (Most Chicks Won't Eat Veal)
S01 E02
Big Flappy Bastards
S01 E03
Go East on Sunset Until You Reach the Gates of Hell
S01 E04
If I Can't Write My Chocolate Song, I'm Going to Take a Nap
S01 E05
The Last Thing You Want to Do Is Wind Up with a Hump
S01 E06
Did You Check With the Captain of the Flying Monkeys?
S01 E07
If They Do Go Either Way, They're Usually Fake
S01 E08
Twenty-Five Little Pre-Pubers Without a Snootful
S01 E09
Phase One, Complete
S01 E10
Merry Thanksgiving
S01 E11
Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor
S01 E12
Camel Filters + Pheromones
S01 E13
Sarah Like Puny Alan
S01 E14
I Can't Afford Hyenas
S01 E15
Round One to the Hot Crazy Chick
S01 E16
That Was Saliva, Alan
S01 E17
Ate the Hamburgers, Wearing the Hats
S01 E18
An Old Flame With a New Wick
S01 E19
I Remember the Coatroom, I Just Don't Remember You
S01 E20
Hey, I Can Pee Outside in the Dark
S01 E21
No Sniffing, No Wowing
S01 E22
My Doctor Has a Cow Puppet
S01 E23
Just Like Buffalo
S01 E24
Can You Feel My Finger?
Season 2
S02 E01
Back Off, Mary Poppins
S02 E02
Enjoy Those Garlic Balls
S02 E03
A Bag Full of Jawea
S02 E04
Go Get Mommy's Bra
S02 E05
Bad News from the Clinic?
S02 E06
The Price of Healthy Gums Is Eternal Vigilance
S02 E07
A Kosher Slaughterhouse Out in Fontana
S02 E08
Frankenstein and the Horny Villagers
S02 E09
Yes, Monsignor
S02 E10
The Salmon Under My Sweater
S02 E11
Last Chance to See Those Tattoos
S02 E12
A Lungful of Alan
S02 E13
Zejdz Z Moich Wlosow (Get Off My Hair)
S02 E14
Those Big Pink Things with Coconut
S02 E15
Smell the Umbrella Stand
S02 E16
Can You Eat Human Flesh with Wooden Teeth?
S02 E17
Woo-Hoo, a Hernia Exam!
S02 E18
It Was 'Mame', Mom
S02 E19
A Low, Guttural Tongue-Flapping Noise
S02 E20
I Always Wanted a Shaved Monkey
S02 E21
A Sympathetic Crotch to Cry On
S02 E22
That Old Hose Bag Is My Mother
S02 E23
Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab, Squab
S02 E24
Does This Smell Funny to You?
Season 3
S03 E01
Weekend In Bangkok with Two Olympic Gymnasts
S03 E02
Principal Gallagher's Lesbian Lover
S03 E03
Carpet Burns and a Bite Mark
S03 E04
Your Dismissive Attitude Toward Boobs
S03 E05
We Called It Mr. Pinky
S03 E06
Hi, Mr. Horned One
S03 E07
Sleep Tight, Puddin' Pop
S03 E08
That Voodoo That I Do Do
S03 E09
Madame and Her Special Friend
S03 E10
Something Salted and Twisted
S03 E11
Santa's Village of the Damned
S03 E12
That Special Tug
S03 E13
Humiliation is a visual medium
S03 E14
Love Isn't Blind, It's Retarded
S03 E15
My Tongue is Meat
S03 E16
Ergo, the Booty Call
S03 E17
The Unfortunate Little Schnauser
S03 E18
The Spit-Covered Cobbler
S03 E19
Golly Moses, She's a Muffin
S03 E20
Always a Bridesmaid, Never a Burro
S03 E21
And the Plot Moistens
S03 E22
Just Once With Aunt Sophie
S03 E23
Arguments for the Quickie
S03 E24
That Pistol-Packin' Hermaphrodite
Season 4
S04 E01
Working for Caligula
S04 E02
Who's Vod Kanockers?
S04 E03
The Sea Is a Harsh Mistress
S04 E04
A Pot Smoking Monkey
S04 E05
A Live Woman of Proven Fertility
S04 E06
Apologies for the Frivolity
S04 E07
Repeated Blows to His Unformed Head
S04 E08
Release the Dogs
S04 E09
Corey's Been Dead for an Hour
S04 E10
Kissing Abe Lincoln
S04 E11
Walnuts and Demerol
S04 E12
Castrating Sheep in Montana
S04 E13
Don't Worry, Speed Racer
S04 E14
That's Summer Sausage, Not Salami
S04 E15
My Damn Stalker
S04 E16
Young People Have Phlegm Too
S04 E17
I Merely Slept with a Commie
S04 E18
It Never Rains in Hooterville
S04 E19
Smooth as a Ken Doll
S04 E20
Aunt Myra Doesn't Pee a Lot
S04 E21
Tucked, Taped and Gorgeous
S04 E22
Mr. McGlue's Feedbag
S04 E23
Anteaters. They're Just Crazy-Lookin
S04 E24
Prostitutes and Gelato
Season 5
S05 E01
Large Birds, Spiders and Mom
S05 E02
Media Room Slash Dungeon
S05 E03
Dum Diddy Dum Diddy Doo
S05 E04
City of Great Racks
S05 E05
Putting Swim Fins on a Cat
S05 E06
Help Daddy Find His Toenail
S05 E07
The Leather Gear Is in the Guest Room
S05 E08
Is There a Mrs. Waffles?
S05 E09
Tight's Good
S05 E10
Kinda Like Necrophilia
S05 E11
Meander to Your Dander
S05 E12
A Little Clammy and None Too Fresh
S05 E13
The Soil Is Moist
S05 E14
Winky-Dink Time
S05 E15
Rough Night In Hump Junction
S05 E16
Look At Me, Mommy, I'm Pretty
S05 E17
Fish in a Drawer
S05 E18
If My Hole Could Talk
S05 E19
Waiting for the Right Snapper
Season 6
S06 E01
Taterhead Is Our Love Child
S06 E02
Pie Hole, Herb
S06 E03
Damn You, Eggs Benedict
S06 E04
The Flavin' and the Mavin'
S06 E05
A Jock Strap in Hell
S06 E06
It's Always Nazi Week
S06 E07
Best H.O. Money Can Buy
S06 E08
Pinocchio's Mouth
S06 E09
The Mooch at the Boo
S06 E10
He Smelled the Ham, He Got Excited
S06 E11
The Devil's Lube
S06 E12
Thank God for Scoliosis
S06 E13
I Think You Offended Don
S06 E14
David Copperfield Slipped Me a Roofie
S06 E15
I'd Like to Start with the Cat
S06 E16
She'll Still Be Dead At Halftime
S06 E17
The 'Ocu' or the 'Pado'?
S06 E18
My Son's Enormous Head
S06 E19
The Two Finger Rule
S06 E20
Hello, I Am Alan Cousteau
S06 E21
Above Exalted Cyclops
S06 E22
Sir Lancelot's Litter Box
S06 E23
Good Morning, Mrs. Butterworth
S06 E24
Baseball Was Better With Steroids
Season 7
S07 E01
S07 E02
Whipped Unto the Third Generation
S07 E03
Mmm, Fish. Yum.
S07 E04
Laxative Tester, Horse Inseminator
S07 E05
For the Sake of the Child
S07 E06
Give Me Your Thumb
S07 E07
Untainted By Filth
S07 E08
Gorp. Fnark. Schmegle.
S07 E09
Captain Terry's Spray-On Hair
S07 E10
That's Why They Call It Ball Room
S07 E11
Warning, It's Dirty
S07 E12
Fart Jokes, Pie and Celeste
S07 E13
Yay, No Polyps!
S07 E14
Crude and Uncalled For
S07 E15
Aye, Aye, Captain Douche
S07 E16
Tinkle Like a Princess
S07 E17
I Found Your Moustache
S07 E18
Ixnay on the Oggie Day
S07 E19
Keith Moon Is Vomiting in His Grave
S07 E20
I Called Him Magoo
S07 E21
Gumby with a Pokey
S07 E22
This Is Not Gonna End Well
Season 8
S08 E01
Three Girls and a Guy Named Bud
S08 E02
A Bottle of Wine and a Jackhammer
S08 E03
A Pudding-Filled Cactus
S08 E04
Hookers, Hookers, Hookers
S08 E05
The Immortal Mr. Billy Joel
S08 E06
Twanging Your Magic Clanger
S08 E07
The Crazy Bitch Gazette
S08 E08
Springtime on a Stick
S08 E09
A Good Time in Central Africa
S08 E10
Ow, Ow, Don't Stop
S08 E11
Dead from the Waist Down
S08 E12
Chocolate Diddlers or My Puppy's Dead
S08 E13
Skunk, Dog, Crap and Ketchup
S08 E14
Lookin' for Japanese Subs
S08 E15
Three Hookers and a Philly Cheesesteak
S08 E16
That Darn Priest
Season 9
S09 E01
Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt
S09 E02
People Who Love Peepholes
S09 E03
Big Girls Don't Throw Food
S09 E04
Nine Magic Fingers
S09 E05
A Giant Cat Holding a Churro
S09 E06
The Squat and the Hover
S09 E07
Those Fancy Japanese Toilets
S09 E08
Thank You for the Intercourse
S09 E09
Frodo's Headshots
S09 E10
A Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes
S09 E11
What a Lovely Landing Strip
S09 E12
One False Move, Zimbabwe!
S09 E13
Slowly and in a Circular Fashion
S09 E14
A Possum On Chemo
S09 E15
The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack
S09 E16
Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy
S09 E17
Not in My Mouth!
S09 E18
The War Against Gingivitis
S09 E19
Palmdale, Ech
S09 E20
Grandma's Pie
S09 E21
Mr. Hose Says 'Yes'
S09 E22
Why We Gave Up Women
S09 E23
The Straw in My Donut Hole
S09 E24
Oh Look! Al-Qaeda!
Season 10
S10 E01
I Changed My Mind About the Milk
S10 E02
A Big Bag of Dog
S10 E03
Four Balls, Two Bats and One Mitt
S10 E04
You Do Know What the Lollipop Is For
S10 E05
That's Not What They Call It in Amsterdam
S10 E06
Ferrets, Attack
S10 E07
Avoid the Chinese Mustard
S10 E08
Something My Gynecologist Said
S10 E09
I Scream When I Pee
S10 E10
One Nut Johnson
S10 E11
Give Santa a Tail-Hole
S10 E12
Welcome to Alancrest
S10 E13
Grab a Feather and Get in Line
S10 E14
Run, Steven Staven! Run!
S10 E15
Paint It, Pierce It or Plug It
S10 E16
Advantage: Fat, Flying Baby
S10 E17
Throgwarten Middle School Mysteries
S10 E18
The 9:04 from Pemberton
S10 E19
Big Episode. Someone Stole a Spoon
S10 E20
Bazinga! That's from a TV Show
S10 E21
Another Night with Neil Diamond
S10 E22
My Bodacious Vidalia
S10 E23
Cows, Prepare to be Tipped
Season 11
S11 E01
S11 E02
I Think I Banged Lucille Ball
S11 E03
This Unblessed Biscuit
S11 E04
Clank, Clank, Drunken Skank
S11 E05
Alan Harper, Pleasing Women Since 2003
S11 E06
Justice in Star-Spangled Hot Pants
S11 E07
Some Kind of Lesbian Zombie
S11 E08
Mr. Walden, He Die. I Clean Room.
S11 E09
Numero Uno Accidente Lawyer
S11 E10
On Vodka, On Soda, On Blender, On Mixer!
S11 E11
Tazed In the Lady Nuts
S11 E12
Baseball. Boobs. Boobs. Baseball.
S11 E13
Bite Me, Supreme Court
S11 E14
Three Fingers of Creme De Menthe
S11 E15
Cab Fare and a Bottle of Penicillin
S11 E16
How to Get Rid of Alan Harper
S11 E17
Welcome Home, Jake
S11 E18
West Side Story
S11 E19
Lan Mao Shi Zai Wuding Shang
S11 E20
Lotta Delis In Little Armenia
S11 E21
Dial 1-900-Mix-a-Lot
S11 E22
Oh, WALD-E, Good Times Ahead
Season 12
S12 E01
The Ol' Mexican Spinach
S12 E02
A Chic Bar in Ibiza
S12 E03
Glamping in a Yurt
S12 E04
Thirty-Eight, Sixty-Two, Thirty-Eight
S12 E05
Oontz, Oontz, Oontz
S12 E06
Alan Shot a Little Girl
S12 E07
Sex with an Animated Ed Asner
S12 E08
Family, Bublé, Deep-Fried Turkey
S12 E09
Bouncy, Bouncy, Bouncy, Lyndsey
S12 E10
Here I Come, Pants!
S12 E11
For Whom the Booty Calls
S12 E12
A Beer Battered Rip-Off
S12 E13
Boompa Loved His Hookers
S12 E14
Don’t Give a Monkey a Gun
S12 E15
Of Course He's Dead (1)
S12 E16
Of Course He's Dead (2)
Episode 1
Original Pilot - Most Chicks Won't Eat Veal
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English only please. Home rules.
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Member’s ratings:
gregm gregm 8
Not the same without Charlie Sheen.
nRumbaII nRumbaII 8
only watched while charlie, in TV
IroX IroX 7
Die Staffeln mit Ashton Kutcher gefallen mir nicht.

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